Workshop Poem

I just finished editing my workshop poem for the first time in over 3 years and it was more difficult than I thought. I did not think it would be easy, because it is close to my heart, but I was also slowed down by a migraine that just wouldn't quit! Anyway, I know that it needed to be polished because things were clear to me since I wrote it, but not so much to the reader. I don't think it was as obvious as I thought it was that it was a dream at first and that it was a phone ringing in the background. I wanted to sure up these details, and make the poem more descriptive, without losing the original emotion that it was written with. I read over it several times and took into the account the suggestions made by my professor, my peers, and my mother (who read it for the first time too). I usually have my mom read things before I turn them in if I can because she has been an english teacher since she graduated from college. After I re-read the poem several times I spent some time thinking about Carolyn and listening to some of her favorite songs to try and get in touch with the emotion that the original was written with. I will be interested to see if this revised version is more concrete and easier to understand, or if it comes across as too straight forward or more numb.

Hopefully it turns out better, but I'm sure there is still more that will come up during the workshop. I am excited to be working with this poem because I have always toyed with the idea of perfecting it. I was also pleased that I was able to read it in our small groups in class on Monday without getting too emotional. It was the first time I have read it aloud since I read it to Carolyn, and it was also the first time anyone other than her or I had seen it, other than being on this blog a couple weeks ago.